A few more days. My economics test will be on Tuesday night. Then the tension will (I fervently hope) slacken off.
Amazing what an evil little gremlin stress can become.
I've been getting along so-so this week with regards to studying. In fact my success was so mediocre that I changed the plan and took two days off.
No big right?
Unless your mother decides its a sign of a lack of commitment. And then proceeds to hammer you about it.
So now, instead of just focusing on studying harder, and for longer hours, my mind is split into little fragments. One tells me to relax. One that everything will be OK. One wonders if I am actually guilty of what I have been accused of. Another one is beating the previous one up. Its friend is telling me not to think about it and focus on the matter at hand. Of course, it's screaming so hard that I can hardly hear what I'm reading. And finally, there's the most dangerous one of all.
The one that keeps remind me of how much I'm regretting that I chose to finish my degree. Not because of the work involved. But because I can't handle the emotional battering that goes with it, whether it comes from me or someone else.
So I'm trying to push all these into a box for later. It's barely less than a week. I can handle this for so long. Right? Right.
Except that it's like a chocolate addiction. The more I'm reminding myself of not thinking about it, the more, I am in fact reminding myself of the thing I'm not supposed to be thinking of.
So yeah... I ended up writing this to give my thoughts air. Hopefully they'll stop breeding and crowding out my studies.
What do you do when the stress gremlin has you in its sights?
For minor stresses, chocolate, red wine, and books.
ReplyDeleteBut for major stresses like this, I pray and then I try to list everything I'm thankful for--it's really hard because that's the last thing I feel like doing, but it usually helps.
Oooo! Mommy guilt. That's powerful stuff. I try not to inflict it on my daughters too often. They're always good at reminding me though that it's THEIR life, not mine,and to BUTT OUT! And that's good advice...tell yourself (I wouldn't dare advise you about your mom)...that it's YOUR life...and then be true to yourself.
ReplyDeleteI wish I had some words of wisdom when it comes to stress and how to deal with it. I'm terrible about stress. I usually try to ignore it until it shows up in physical ways like a nervous twitch. It made me a very bad procrastinator--waiting until the night before my 10+ page paper was due to write it and the like. Yeah, it was very bad in school.
ReplyDeleteI still get stressed at times now, but I've come to recognize it a little more. I try to take a deep breath, acknowledge I'm stressed about this, and break the matter up into pieces and work on each piece individually. Have a bunch to study? Just focus on one small topic within it. Then move to the next. Have a lot to do? Make a list and cross things off as you do them. I found out it helps with me.
And in the end, it really will be okay. Seriously. :)
I like the advice about chocolate, wine, and good books. :)
ReplyDeleteHugs, supportive phone calls to people that won't nag you with advice, cleaning. Stress blows and all you can do it is channel it into something productive.
ReplyDeleteI keep thinking I'm terrible with time management. Then I realized I was getting everything but writing done each day. Which is okay, getting the degree is a little more important at the moment.
You are stronger than you look Misha, keep breathing. Maybe go bake something so you can punch the dough ;)
When I get like that, I remind myself that 99% of the things I worry about never happen, as well as the fact that worrying changes nothing. I'm a believer and I find that the Bible has a lot of comfort inside its covers.
ReplyDeleteI micro-manage things to avoid the stress in my life. I try not to let things get out of control.
ReplyDeleteGremlin was my nickname in college. :) I might tell you why in email. lol
ReplyDeleteExams are tough. That was always a lot of stress. There was a lot of eating and hijinx. My roommate and I glued a bbq potato chip to our wall at the end of first term while studying for exams. We left it there the rest of the year to see what would happen to it. Nothing. It never changed color or anything.
These days, I go bug my husband or the cats for hugs, then talk until I feel a bit better.
I used to take breaks in between studying and do something fun. Friends and I would go grab dinner and talk about how much we hated school. Or I would read to relax.
ReplyDeleteMy mom still does the same thing to me. Isn't it annoying?
I feel for you and can 100% relate to the fragmented feeling. I feel like that all the time. One part of me says, "you're doing the best you can." The other part says, "You're trying hard enough. You suck." And on it goes.
ReplyDeleteI hope you're able to de-stress soon. I know it's the worst for me when I have too much going on at one time without a break and some time for myself in between.
When it's bad, I just try to remember to breathe. :P
ReplyDeleteOy! Studying...ugh. Good luck! You can do it!
ReplyDeleteI can relate to your stress as August was that kind of month for me.
ReplyDeleteWhat I did was make of list of everything I needed to do breaking down some of the bigger things into steps so they weren't so scary. Then I picked out one of the bigger things, and knocked it out, not focusing on anything else on the list. The world will seem so much sunnier. Then you pick something else.
It may be hard now, but I'm sure you'll be so happy you chose to finish your degree once it's all over! Hang in there! And eat lots of chocolate. :)
ReplyDeleteIt will all pass and then there will be new stresses. I usually didn't get too stressed when I was in college, but then again I wasn't taking it all that serious and didn't finish back then. Later when I did finish I was older and didn't get so stressed because I was older and had work to get more stressed about.
ReplyDeleteMaybe try to visualize success and relaxed times to come. That might help get you through the present stressful times.
Lee
Tossing It Out
Sometimes a secret :) break can re-energize you like nothing else.
ReplyDeleteRun away...LOL, you are so in my head right now :)
ReplyDeleteI tend to take it easy by dropping things that are not urgent. Listen to music, meditate and pray and take deep and calming breaths.
ReplyDeleteDrink. Sometimes, haha. But a short break (unless I have looming deadlines) does wonders for stress.
ReplyDelete