Monday, September 18, 2017

Silence

Last week, I didn't update anything. Mostly, it was because I had a mad week, including one day where I was sitting on a film set, pretending to watch tennis for about twelve hours.

But except for that, knowing that I would be doing that all day meant I had to squeeze everything else into the rest of my week. (And you guys know I'm snowed under in the best of circumstances.)

Honestly, though, I've been quiet last week for another reason: 911.

Monday came and I didn't know what to say. I remembered the day our lives all changed, but I couldn't find anything to say about it. It would have been good to say that it's brought us closer together, but recent events have all but proven that it has not.

So what do I say?

How sad it was? That's ridiculous, given the cost of life, both on the day and as a result of the aftermath. It's not a sad day. It was and still is a tragedy.

Do I talk about how the world has gotten up from this blow and became a better place because we refused to give in to fear, hatred and bigotry?

Do I say I'll remember? That I'll never forget? Again... pointless because that goes without saying. But what does "Never Forget" even mean? Last year, I thought of it as a call to remember the dead, the loss of innocence. Last week, it felt like recalling an old grudge.

So really. I'm at a loss. And I've been at a loss for days.

20 comments:

  1. It's the worst tragedy of our lifetime. What can we say?

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    1. Yeah I agree. There have been events with larger losses of life since. But this one was the one that changed the way everyone thinks about basically everything.

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  2. No words were necessary. Sometimes silence says everything. Save those words for those awesome books of yours.

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  3. What you say is true, but I felt encouraged by the way that people worked together during the two recent hurricanes.

    Love,
    Janie

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  4. Sometimes I think we're closer together than the media allows us to think. In times of tragedy, you see it.

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    1. Yeah, you're right. I guess "everyone's getting along here, here and here" doesn't sell papers.

      I guess I'm just a bit down because it keeps feeling like everything repeats.

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  5. Hi Misha - tragedy does bring us together ... and let's hope we are spreading and thinking about how our actions affect others ... we will always remember some things ... but it's the day to day actions that count now. Cheers Hilary

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    1. I agree. I'm becoming a bit cynical about the mouth-work done about "unity" and "peace" and "freedom."

      We should be doers. Every day. Even if it's a little thing we did to make things a little better.

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  6. I get that conflict. Feel it myself sometimes. The huge contrasts that live so vividly in our world today harness some might say the struggle of right-wrong, good-bad, good over evil type of thing ORr the process of transformation death to old birth to new, endings and beginnings.

    Much food for fodder, the story and imagination. I struggle to look to imagination to find hope, reason and beauty. I want really bad to do this and translate into to story. The hard part is overcoming myself, my reaction, fear, disappointment or shock of all that goes on around me to take action and JUST WRITE, dang it, WRITE. That is my biggest struggle to function within the chaos of daily living and the reflections of disorder in the world that surrounds us all.

    Small steps, small goals, one day at time.. You are an inspiration and what you do get done even in chaos is inspiring, amazing and gives hope to others with struggles too.

    Sending you happy, positive energy and may beautiful stories fill your mind from the chaos that seeks to slow you down. Hang in there.
    HUGS
    Juneta




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    1. Yeah, I also struggle to write when surrounded with so much negativity, because it becomes so hard to find something positive to work on among all that.

      Best of luck with your writing! *hugs*

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  7. It's hard for me to come up with the right thing to say about 9/11 too. Even though I didn't personally know anyone who died or was injured on that day, the whole situation still makes me feel so sad and angry. I've thought about writing stories that are set during that time period, but it's hard to think of how to describe it.

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    1. Yeah it is hard. I've thought about trying to process 9/11 through writing, but I don't even know where to start.

      I guess maybe this post was me giving up on the idea of ever really processing it.

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  8. There is nothing one can do but feel shitty for a while and slowly claw our way back, out of the darkness. Its awful, but just taking it a step at a time makes it easier to do. These days I have to create myself a little bubble, to survive in this crazy world, or the darkness swallows me whole and it would be another year before I get out again.

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    1. Yeah it's the same with me. I try to insulate myself from the first news cycle as much as possible, because that's the OMG! DRAMA! one. And although I don't have depression, I do have anxiety, and that one DOES NOT do well with that OMG THE WORLD IS ENDING AND EVERYTHING IS BAD sense I get when reading the news.

      But I don't want to completely live in a bubble, so I eventually start reading think pieces and analyses of events, which also gives me enough distance to come to my own conclusions.

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  9. Some wounds don't heal, it's part of being human and it happens because we care. I try to remember that and it helps me carry on:)

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  10. Like Elizabeth said, people were closer together than the media allows us to think.

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    1. Yes it's possible and even likely that any discord is being shown as even worse than it is because that sells papers.

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