Friday, January 28, 2011

Well excuuuuuuse me Princess!

Just want to remind all of you interested in a GPF spot to mail me. Next week's slot has already been taken, but I need more people to fill in the rest of the month. I have decided to put the posts up at 06h00 my time on Friday mornings, so please remember to click over to show support to our first brave soul. My mail, for in case you don't want to go hunting for it, is mishagericke@gmail.com.

In the mean time, on my last Friday post for the foreseeable future, some of you might want to leave now. I'm going to be showing a bit of my dark side. 

Yesterday, I was making my way down a certain Mr. McLinky list, looking for some new blogs to read and stumbled onto one that had someone (who will remain unnamed) who seemed to be deeply upset by the fact that she didn't seem to be reaching anyone out there. Main theme of the blog as I read it being that she didn't have a big following.

So I commented as follows:

I clicked over here from Grab a Pen.
How long have you been writing?
How long have you been blogging?
It took me three months before I reached seven people.

It took me three and a half to realize that if I follow other blogs and commented as often as I can, people come back to me.
I don't say this to be mean, but rather because even though the post I just read isn't the happiest ever, you have great style.
Style = Potential
Style=Skill
So there must be some other reason why you have few followers.
I also found that asking a question at the end of each blog post is an easy way to get people to comment.

But anyway, I can give you a few tips. I'm not even remotely close to big, but I do have over 150 followers and quite a few regular visitors.
If you want them, or just want to talk, feel free to e-mail me.

Now, please, anyone. Did I seem rude? Did I seem to be ridiculing or insulting her in any way?

Because honestly I was just trying to help her out.

But this is word for word the e-mail I got back (except for the name that has been changed):


Nice to meet you.

I clicked over here from Grab a Pen.
How long have you been writing?
If you have a chance to take a look at the rest of the web page, you'll find I've been writing since I was 9.
How long have you been blogging?
Again, if you look at the beginning of my blog, you'll see how long.
It took me three months before I reached seven people.
It took me three and a half to realize that if I follow other blogs and commented as often as I can, people come back to me.
I don't say this to be mean, but rather because even though the post I just read isn't the happiest ever, you have great style.
Style = Potential
Style=Skill
So there must be some other reason why you have few followers.
Thank you. I think I have style too. It might be the reason why I've published a book already and have another one coming out in the fall as to why I have a few followers.
I also found that asking a question at the end of each blog post is an easy way to get people to comment.
But anyway, I can give you a few tips. I'm not even remotely close to big, but I do have over 150 followers and quite a few regular visitors.
I appreciate that, but I'm quite happy to have anyone who wants to stop by. I'm not terribly interested in advertising.
If you want them, or just want to talk, feel free to e-mail me.
Sincerely,


Little Princess with No Manners.
 
 
Now, feel free to correct me if you think I'm wrong (as I will not send any snotty e-mails to those who dare to ask/say something not even vaguely impertinent) but that was so far out of line that I think the she didn't even know it existed.
 
This is how I feel about this.
 
So freaking what. If I didn't read the rest of the web page and I try to strike up a conversation, you either answer like a civilized human being or you shut the f*(k up. 
 
If you want to complain on your blog and want to suffer your pain in private: don't link up to one of the most read blogs out there.
 
Yes princess: Headdesk is now appropriate.
 
Secondly: If you are going to staunchly refuse to do anything about increasing your readership then why in the name of all that is holy do you complain about it?
 
Who knows? Maybe she just wanted to be a martyr and suffer for her art or something and my attempt to help her out really rubbed her wrong.
 
But then this is what you do, Princess, you ignore me. You could have kindly not have taken me up on my offer.
 
Or... You could have gnashed your teeth and sent me an upbeat mail about how you really just freaked out that day and felt down. Because, like OMG! You don't even really like followers.
 
Or something like that.
 
But bitching on someone - as far as I saw the first one to comment for at least five posts - for daring to comment after you complained about no one commenting...
 
Not. On.
 
In fact:
 
STUPID.
 
I have complained too. Hell knows I complained about few followers in the beginning too. It's very hard to blog to empty space.
 
But every time I complain, I take the risk that - GASP! - someone who I don't know from Adam or Eve is going to tell me to pick myself up by my shoe straps. And guess what? The normal reaction will be to thank that person and to ask them how to do it. Because if you post something on a public blog, someone might just answer and it might just not be what you would like to hear.
 
But that is not your commenter's problem.
 
EVER.
 
 
 
 
 
 
*Takes a deep breath.*
 
Thus endeth the rant.
 
If any of you read through this, and I suspect that some of you will...
 
I just want to thank all of you who have told me to pick myself up by my bootstraps when others only offer sympathy. And thank you for those that always cover me with love and sympathy when I'm down.
 
I need both sometimes and I love everyone of you for it.
 
And really, if I misconstrued anything she said, or you differ in opinion about how my comment seemed, please let me know. Because I honestly don't get what her problem was.

32 comments:

Devin Bond said...

I can see where she might've gotten a bit miffed if she read your comment wrong, but honestly I think she just had a bad reaction to some nice words. :/

As for hers though... Sorry but the "I think I have style" was a bit too cocky for my tastes.

I also can't believe someone who's published already wouldn't want to advertise themselves a little. That's what blogging's all about. Selling ourselves and creating (hopefully) a kinda fanbase... right??

That's what I always thought.

Misha said...

Maybe you're right, maybe she did get a bad reaction...

It was exactly the "I think I have style" line that sent my blood pressure upwards. I don't have the longest fuse in the world.

I agree with you about the advertising. I thought one of the big rationales behing blogging was to build a platform...

Maybe you and I both have it wrong. ;-P

Jade said...

If I stumbled onto a new blog that was complaining about the lack of followers, I'd just keep clicking, so you're doing better than me.

I think people are just a little bit too sensitive. I mean, why did she write the post if she didn't want some sort of response?

Misha said...

Thank you! I was feeling exactly the same way. So I wrote the comment.

Seems I was operating under a wrong impression. ;-P Thanks for dropping by on mine though.

:-)

Em-Musing said...

Lord! You were only trying to help her. She didn't need to slam you with her "princess" attitude. Who knows why some people can't just say, "Thanks."

Misha said...

Thanks for that. :-)

The Blogger Formerly Known As said...

Seriously, Misha? You didn’t read every single one of her posts before commenting? How rude ;)

No, you weren’t rude at all :)

Anne said...

Ugh. I hate when people act like that. She put out a call for help and turned up her nose. I thought you were just trying to be nice. Hope you have a great weekend!

Misha said...

Yeah Blogs, stomping all over people's insecurities is how I roll. ;-) Hahahahahahahaha. Seriously though. I'm glad to hear that you think I'm in the right.

Maybe I should cut down on my evil laughter on some points, don't you think?

Anne, I feel like that too. That's why I was so upset. I hope you have an awesome weekend too.
Thanks for dropping by.

:-)

Faith said...

Even though comments can get easily misunderstood when read online (since there's no tone for context), I still don't see how she could have interpreted your comments the way she did. And *even* if she was upset by your comments (y'know, the comments that responded directly to what she was *blogging about*), you never, ever, EVER want to burn bridges if you can help it in the writing business.

EVER. You never know when that one blogger you slandered might get an agent, pub contract, whatever, and your name might come up in casual conversation by coincidence. If that person had a bad experience? Guess where that opportunity goes...

It's a long shot, yes, but even in the blogging sphere, it's a small world. You know?

It was rude of her to become so defensive. Even if she thought you were being, I don't know, rude or something, she should have either ignored you or responded politely to be the bigger person (and to try and gauge whether she'd misinterpreted you).

Those defensive, rude comments of hers were utterly uncalled for.

Misha said...

Thanks Faith. You pretty much said what I should have posted today. But of course, I blogged immediately after I got her e-mail.

Thank you for putting it so nicely.

And thanks for dropping by my blog. :-)

Maria Zannini said...

You can't fix clueless. But in this instance, I'd say it was a case of inexperience in blog etiquette.

I think it was very classy of you to offer some kind words and real interest. That she chose to be condescending and petty in her response says more about her than anything else.

PS I like your blog VERY much. I found you after you found me. (Thank you for that!) I'll be sure to stop by more often.

Misha said...

Lol you are so right, some things just can't be fixed. :-)

Thanks for the complement and for dropping by.

SM Schmidt said...

All I can think of is maybe the Princess in question is still very young and suffers from wounded pride angst. The type where if someone offers advice their first reaction is to do the spaghetti test, i.e. I lash out and see if you put up with it.

And then some people never leave junior high and are just jerks.

gideon 86 said...

First of all, if she is a published author with another one on the way, How clueless is this chick?

YOU HAVE TO advertise. The publisher's expect it. Times have changed, they are NOT going to do it for you.

This person really needs to get a grip. You did NOTHING wrong. If anything you were sweet and kind trying to give her a helping hand, and then she has the nerve to BITE it.

Don't give it a second thought, Misha...

Michael

Patti said...

I don't think you should be complaining about followers. There's lots of advice out there about what to do and you gave her some great tips.

It sounds like she's the kind of person who complains, but doesn't like to take anyone's advice.

Misha said...

SM I love the concept of the spaghetti test. I was laughing myself silly a while back.

You're right, of course. Some people never learn to grow up.

Thanks Michael. I agree with you to think that she must be pretty clueless if she doesn't understand the mechanics of book marketing and blogging.

Donea Lee said...

Hi Misha! I'll agree - if I'd read a post about "why don't I have followers", I would try to help out with some tips, too. That was SOOO nice of you to even take that much time! You could have just commented, "Oh, well - better luck with that." :) It's hard to keep up sometimes. There's a lot of fabulous new blogs to discover and I know that when I find a new one I don't always have time (regrettably, of course) to read every single past post the blogger has ever put out there.

You did everything right. No worries! Boo on the Princess... :)

N. R. Williams said...

I think you should go over, email her again, tell her she has won a prize from you, ask for her mailing address so you can send it and then...wait...I think you might laugh.

Send boot straps with a note that say's, "Pick yourself up, honey."

I've had a few rude people too.
Nancy
N. R. Williams, fantasy author

Talei said...

Wow! I find it incredible that she's already published a book and doesn't know how to build a following of readers? How many books has she sold?

Well, I hope you don't spend anymore energy on this person, I'd put said Princess on the thinking chair and leave her there to figure things out herself. ;)

Have a wonderful writerly weekend!

Misha said...

Thanks Donea. I know what you mean about the many blogs. I've now clicked follow to my 300th blog. And it's nowhere close to all the great people out there. So thanks for taking the time to check out and following mine. :-)

Hi Nancy I love your idea... But sadly postage will be more than the gratification I'll get. I will store it away for future reference though. :-D

Talei I agree with you completely. And no, I wanted to e-mail her, but then realized that she would likely write something back. And then I'd have to write something... So I decided to ignore a message I didn't like.

Thanks for stopping by and following my blog.
:-)

Misha said...

Patti I think you're right. She just wanted to complain as supposed to do something to make it better. Thanks for dropping by. :-)

Lynda Young said...

I actually feel sorry for her. She obviously doesn't understand the whole blogging thing and doesn't seem willing to learn. She's missing out!

Victoria Dixon said...

Holy Smokies. What a response! I suppose it's possible she misread the tone of your email. It's unfortunately easy to do, but I'm not sure how she could have in this instance.

If she was intentionally snarky, it's not a wonder she's lacking followers. Still, I pity her because she's obviously been told (by a well-intentioned agent, editor, publisher or publicist) that she needs to blog and have a web presence, but she has no skill for it. A web presence can simply be a professionally designed website, for pete's sake! Writers, don't blog if you don't enjoy it. I DO enjoy it, yet it takes so much time from my writing, I have contemplated pulling back on my blogging activity. Blogging with her attitude will have the opposite of the intended effect. :(

BTW, thanks for coming over and following, not to mention entering the contest! I've got you down for three points. :D

Misha said...

You're right, Lynda. It's sad, really. :-)

I agree Victoria. The other sad thing is that blogging only becomes really fun when you have some people taking an interest...

Blogging eats up my time too. But right now I enjoy it too much to pull back. Not when my writing isn't technically suffering because of it.

It's always a pleasure to follow a great blog. Thanks for following me too. :-)

Su said...

I agree with everyone else-- you're nicer than me, I wouldn't even have commented on someone who was moaning about how no one was reading! Why bother post, then??

Sounds like a classic case of "I can say what I want, it's the internet." Sheesh.

Don't lose any sleep over it! ;)

Misha said...

Su thank you so much for saying that. :-)

Thanks for dropping by.

Cherie Reich said...

Oh, wow! I don't think you were rude at all. Although I haven't read her post on the matter, it seems to me if you are lamenting your lack of followers that you would love some to give you some pointers. I know I would. Sheesh, some people!

By the way, I wanted to drop in and say "Hi!" *waves* Thanks for the blog follow, and I look forward to reading your posts. :)

E.J. Wesley said...

So very true. Sharing on other blogs has to be the # 1 way to network and get more followers. Plus, I think it's the best part of the whole thing. (Getting to know other writers/bloggers.)

This story kind of made me sad. Don't get me wrong, I love followers, but there is just so much more in this for me than seeing how many people I can get to keep up with me. I think I'd blog even if no one followed me. Come to think of it, that's how I started! :)

Misha said...

*waves* Hi Cherie, thanks for your comment. I'm so glad that I'm not the only one who thought that way.

By the way, I always love following new blogs and I enjoyed reading what you posted. :-)

Me too E.J. In fact, I have more than one early post that I was lamenting the fact where I was writing to empty air. But I soon went to larger blogs and contacted the writers to ask what they did to get read. And you know, almost all of them answered me within days. I fell in love with this community then.

Thank you so much for checking out my blog. :-)

Jordyn said...

Her reaction definitely seemed a bit rude and out of line, but hey - maybe your comment just rubbed her the wrong way (I have no idea why; it was perfectly nice) and she didn't think before she replied?

We all have our bad days. It's unfortunate that the internet now caches them for us. :)

Misha said...

Jordyn, you make a good point. My comment must have rubbed her wrong, but the point remains that most bloggers have the sense to cut off their own fingers before sending something like that to other bloggers.

Still, I guess she was a novice to the blogging idea, so I should give her some slack. Doesn't meant that I'll ever go near her blog again.

Anyway, thanks very much for dropping by and commenting. I promise that I'm more friendly than the post you read.

:-)